Christmas Post (continued)

Now, where was I?  Oh, yes, the hibachi white elephant gift.  So, Jake's girlfriend, Jess, came up with the best way to get someone to pick the hibachi grill.  I bought a bottle of wine, a nice red and typed up this little ditty:

Ah, the delectable, robust taste of red wine in the winter gives one that cozy feeling.  If only I had a steak to eat with it.  But what would we cook it on?

(drum roll, please)

(lift)

Then underneath that:

CONGRATULATIONS!

You are now the owner of the wondrous hibachi grill!

(at least you have wine to dull the pain)

I had the whole place dying laughing, it was great!  And the funniest part is my cousin Devon is the one who picked the gift even though we had been talking about what I was going to do for the 2 days prior to Christmas Eve.  Boys, they don't pay attention much.  So, now Devon has the hibachi grill and will have to come up with something funny and new for next year.

After the Pratt Christmas, we drove down to Dodgeville, had our traditional Tom and Jerry's and went to bed.  We got up the next morning to have Christmas morning with my parents and Jake.  We got really nice things and it was great except for when Mom got sick.

Yes, she got some bug which I have now heard was running rampant on Christmas day.  So, poor Mom had to miss the McKinlay Christmas which she has not missed since she lived in Aspen in 1976 or something like that.  We had yummy food and wine at Scott and Renee's, as always and then did a White Elephant exchange for the first time on the McKinlay side.  It was a bit chaotic and loud but it was fun and everyone seemed to enjoy it and laugh a lot.  It started getting pretty slick out so everyone headed out shortly after the gift opening.

The greatest part of all ofthis, besides friends, family and presents, of course, is that we then had the whole weekend ahead of us.  Yes!  I sat on my but and did nothing on Saturday (besides feed Mariah's kitties) until about 3pm when I met Carla and Liz for the movie-musical "Nine" (critique about that to come next).  Then off to Kari's for Brent's birthday dinner, which was fabulous, as Kari's food always is.  Of course, drinks were involved but I ended up home a bit after 11pm and hopped in bed with my man.  He is really cozy.

Sunday involved more laziness and the new Super Mario Brothers for the Wii (just learned of a new game for Wii last night called Just Dance...it involves lots of awesome songs and dance moves that you have to mimic...totally need to get it...so fun!).  Then off to work again this week.  Blah!  Although I really can't complain cause it has been really quiet around here.  Now, I am just waiting for this day to be done so I can go home, watch movies with my (soon-to-be) hubby and get myself ready for another New Year's Eve celebration.  I might have to go use my Old Navy gift card and get a new going out shirt or dress or something.  We'll see.  Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!  Here's a nod for 2009 and a look ahead to 2010!

Christmas, It's The Best Time Of The Year!

Christmas is now officially over and the New Year is on the horizon.  We had a great time, again, this year.

Elena, Devon and Bonnie got into town on Monday night and we went to Dexter's for a couple of drinks and fine conversation.  I met Jake's girlfriend, Jess, the Friday before, but only for a brief moment.  They came over to hang with Mike and I on Sunday and they both came out on Monday so it was nice to get to know her a bit better.  We went back home about 1:00 am or so which did not make for the easiest time for me to get up the following morning at 5:45 am for work.  Luckily, it was very quiet at the hospital so I just did as little as possible to make it through the day.

That evening  Elena and I visited Jackie and Alex.  What a cute little bugger that boy is.  After that we went out to our aunt Noel's for dinner.  Mushroom ravioli with pasta sauce, salad and bread.  So good!  Then we went to Greenway Station for some last minute Christmas shopping.  I know but that is how my family rolls.  Back to the apartment to hang out and go to bed around 12:30.  Again, pretty rough getting up the next day again but this time it was even better cause more people were gone from the office.  The day went by really fast and I was once again ready to go.


Elena picked me up and we headed to Molly's house to visit her, Hazel and Ben.  That Hazel is just a cute thing.  After that Elena headed out to Noel's for the traditional Indian dinner.  I stayed back because Claire was in town and I haven't seen her for months.  We started out at Jackie's place and got to see Alex eat peas.  So cute! 

           

                                                                                                                                                                                                                          


                      
We then went out and grabbed some dinner at Mickey's on Willy Street.  Love that place.  Then out to Dexter's for more libations.  Claire informed the group she was going to get the Bumpit to use for her wedding.  Jackie and Molly immediately went to Walgreens to get said product.  There was definitely some interesting goings on with the Bumpit.  The other ladies left and Elena and I hung out, of course, until bar time.


We woke up the next day, grabbed some grub and ran to Woodman's for cheese and booze.  Again, I know but that is how my family rolls.  Back to the apartment to get ready and then onto Noel's for Christmas Eve festivities.

The food was great as usual.  Then onto the White Elephant Christmas gift exchange.  We have a tradition in our family with the White Elephant gift exchange which involves a mini hibachi grill.  I am not sure how long ago it started.  Tammy and Tim brought it for a gift exchange and mysteriously it ended up back in the pile the following year.  It has been showing back up in the pile every year since.  I was the unfortunate one to have picked the hibachi last year.  I had to come up with a sneaky way for it to get chosen.  To be continued...

Teacher, teacher!

Mike, our friend Steve and I are in the car driving to Platteville to drop Steve off at his Mom's for Thanksgiving on our way to Lancaster when we hear this news story:

A janitor was doing his rounds while all of the students were at an assembly when he found the female Spanish teacher and the female French teacher were having sex on a desk in one of the classrooms.

Steve: You can't write porn that good!
Me: What would you name this porn?
Steve (without skipping a beat): Bilingual.

Too funny!

I Mean, Come On...Just Too Much

 

 --reblogged from 9GAG

Thanksgiving

Ah, Thanksgiving.  Such a lovely time.  The only thing that sucks about Thanksgiving is when it's over.

This year, Mike and I went down to Lancaster to his folks' place to have the best Thanksgiving dinner of all (the only thing that comes close is my friend Kari's Thanksgiving dinner to which we had the pleasure of inhaling last year).  I helped out a lot this year as I was the only "daughter" there.  Amy couldn't travel that far so Anna had Thanksgiving dinner at her place for them and a couple of John's relatives.  Joe and Jen were going to go to Jen's family's this year but three out of the four of them, Jen, Gus and Ava, had the flu so they ended up staying at home.  I must admit, and this is purely selfish, of course, it was nice in only one way...I got Mary to myself.  It was nice to help her cook and chat.

This Thanksgiving was no comparison to having the kids around though.  Luckily, we got up to Eau Claire the weekend before to see everyone (well, almost everyone...Kiki stayed at a friend's house so we missed her.  Cute side note though, a couple of days before we went to visit, Kiki texted me and said "I can't believe you are finally my aunt!"  I believe Grandma Spider - Mary, Mike's mom...it's what the kids call her...I assume because one of them when they were little couldn't pronounce Schrader properly - told her about my getting my wedding dress, which is gorgeous, by the way.  I wrote back that I would be soon enough.  I am very ecstatic, fortunate and happy to be entering such a wonderful, loving family.) and hang out a bit.  Hopefully most of them will be down for Christmas on December 12.  All in all though, it was a wonderfully lovely Thanksgiving...with all of the necessary leftovers, of course.  Mmm, mmm, good.

Now, if I could just get my hands on Kari's leftovers... :)

Jimmy Fallon

I never was really a huge fan of Jimmy Fallon but after watching these, I have a new found love for him.  Check out more on his website.

Mammogrpahy Guidelines, continued

Another article and video of Dr. Gale Sisney.  Read article here.

New Mammography Screening Guidelines

This is a video of Dr. Gale Sisney, our Chief of Breast Imaging here in the Department of Radiology at UW Hospital, talking about the new mammography guidelines.  You can check out the article here.

A Boy and his Flag

10-Year-Old Won't Pledge Allegiance To A Country That Discriminates Against Gays

soupsoup:

“I’ve always tried to analyze things because I want to be lawyer,” Will said. “I really don’t feel that there’s currently liberty and justice for all.”

After asking his parents whether it was against the law not to stand for the pledge, Will decided to do something. On Monday, Oct. 5, when the other kids in his class stood up to recite the pledge of allegiance, he remained sitting down. The class had a substitute teacher that week, a retired educator from the district, who knew Will’s mother and grandmother. Though the substitute tried to make him stand up, he respectfully refused. He did it again the next day, and the next day.

~~reblogged from Mariah, Not Carey

Drinking in Wisconsin...it's an art, I admit it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7WlwumGkSec

You have to listen to this!

Two Girls, a Cliche, and a Blog....and a really funny quote

This is from my friend Carla and her friend Jess' new blog, Two Girls, a Cliche, and a Blog...her quote was too funny not to reblog but check it out for yourself.


"Is it ironic that there's an anchor pointing in between her large fake breasts where, I am sure, many semen have been before? I think not."

Too funny, my friend.

Question of the Day

My coworker, Carrie, after noticing my spider friend hanging in my office window, asked this question:

How do spiders survive in the winter?

According to yahoo answers:

Spiders like the garden orb weavers, argiopes, widow varieties that only live one season, will die in Winter, leaving behind their egg sac for the next season. Other spiders like tarantulas and fishing spiders, that live longer may hibernate in Winter spending the cold weather under tree bark or rocks, or in cellars and attics. Some adults survive by preparing a winter nest of silken webbing under loose bark within which they are insulated from the cold. In several species, young spiderlings hatch out, then remain in a communal webbed egg sac through the winter. Those spiders that hibernate in leaf litter and in rock piles often are not deeply asleep, and on mild winter days may crawl about in search of insect food that is plentiful and easy to secure in its dormant state. Young spiders often take refuge in moss, and should you bring a clump into the house, be prepared to have spiderlings and many other little hibernating creatures crawl out as warmth unlocks their muscles and increases their metabolism and consumption of oxygen.

Gotta love google.

Another Blog

I just started another blog, Harlot of Quotes.  I only have one up so far but check it out...it's my favorite one.

Dexter's Monologued Quote

"Camouflage is nature's craftiest trick."

Yep, This Sums It Up

Newman, You Bastard!

I don't mean to speak ill of the dead, but Paul Newman has pretty much fucked me...and not in a good way.  I have a love for ranch dressing where there was none before...particularly, Newman's Own Ranch Dressing.  Now, I understand that I have been fucked already with the way I eat but I certainly do not need to be adding to that and clearly, I have.  This is not good, folks.

Vino

I wanted to shoot myself and/or others at work yesterday.  Thank the heavans and all that is true and right and good in this world that someone jumped on grapes and got the idea to make it into the best alcoholic beverage in the world.  I have said it before and I will say it again...Wino Forever!

Hazel Ilene Schlichting

Here is my friend, Molly's baby.  These were just so cute I needed to steal them from her blog and put them on mine.
 

 






  

 

 

Almost VIP Scene

I forgot about one other aspect of our Chicago trip.  On Saturday, we met up with Elena's friend, Mike, from Omaha that happened to be visiting Chicago the same weekend.  It turns out that he and his wife, Kalen, stayed with his buddy the night before (and were supposed to the whole weekend) and he was just a horrendous host and really weird.  There was some sort of happenings on Saturday morning as well so Mike decided they were getting the hell out there and staying at a hotel.  He has another buddy of his get online and reserve a room (turns out it was $300 cause the Chicago marathon was taking place Sunday) for them.  They got to the hotel and they did not have them down for a room.  Mike, of course, was pissed and did not want to deal with anymore bullshit at this point so he sort of flipped (also turns out that the room had already been charged to them but there was no record at the hotel for some reason), telling the front desk people that this was shittiest weekend they had ever had so far and now this, yada, yada, yada.  Well, they were like we are so sorry, this hotel is booked, we will stay with you until we can find another room for you.  Get this...they put them up in a "spa" room at the new Trump Towers Hotel, which is $2000 per night.  Not bad, huh?

Mike is telling us this over drinks at the Trump Towers hotel bar, Rebar, where I was going to get a glass of wine until I realized the cheapest glass was $16.  Yep, $16.  I settled for a glass of cold sake for $10, a bit more manageable.  Anyway, so we get the story and are having a good time.  We part after the one drink cause Elena and I are hung over and are just going to catch the 8:35 train back to Deerfield and stay in for the night (plus, all of our money was gone at that point) and Mike and Kalen had to make their 8:30 dinner reservations.  Mike has a cigarette out front of the hotel (I bummed one...I know...but the pack that I have has lasted through two drinking weekends and I believe that only about 8 cigs have been smoked over that time period), Kalen runs up to the room cause she forgot her camera, she gets back down, we say our goodbyes and Elena and I walk away.  Come to find out, right after we left them, 50 Cent and his entourage show up out front!  Well, shit!  That would have been the icing on our VIP cake.  Not that I like 50 Cent or anything but, hey, two celebs in two days...and that close...V.I.P...I'm not saying, I'm just saying...

VIP View

Here is the view from our seat at Roof at theWit Hotel.  Coolio, foolio!

VIP in Chi-Town

Well, at least we felt like VIP, which, really, is the only thing that matters.

So, I left for Chicago on Thursday right after work to go pick Elena up at Midway. The chaos at that place could be entire blog post in and of itself so I won't go there...let me just say this...holy shit! So, I pick Elena up and we head back to Deerfield, the suburb her grandma Peg has a house in...good news for us, she doesn't live there right now so we had the whole place to ourselves. Well, due to aforementioned chaos at Midway and a decent drive to Deerfield in itself, we did not get to that area until 9pm and we hadn't eaten dinner yet so we stopped at a Jimmy Johns. On the way home, we are talking about how Elena has the code and needs to disarm the alarm when we get to her grandma's house. I point out that with all of the chaos so far tonight, watch, the alarm is going to go off and the cops will show up. Sure as shit, what do you think happens...luckily, we figured out how to shut it off in a relatively short amount of time but, of course, the alarm people called (Jackie, you know how this goes although you usually dealt with it much earlier in the morning...sorry about that...although I will say that I don't believe I was there any of the times the alarm went off but I digress...), Elena gave them the verbal code and let them know 3 times that we were ok and no, you do not have to send the cops...we wanted to eat, bust into some refreshments of all kinds and just relax with some bad reality tv...mission accomplished.

So, Friday rolls around and we go get some breakfast and coffee at a Panera-type place but better and use the internet to find out which train we need to take to get to the city and what the times were. After that we had just about enough time to sit for a bit, get ready, grab refreshments (Jose Cuervo Margaritas - Mom, your favorite drink or do you buy the Sauza ones?) for the train ride to the city and grab said train. So, we get to the city, dressed to kill and we head to our first destination, Berghoff. I am sure that most, if not all, of you know what Berghoff is, a really good beer, root beer, beverage maker in general that was established in 1882 and managed to stay open through Prohibition by selling near-beer and its sodas.

After some appetizers, free bread and two martinis each (Elena - Root Beer martini and me - Kettle One dirty martini, of course) we head to the very historical, very famous Chicago Theatre to see Kathy Griffin. The theatre was established in 1921. It was the "first large, lavish movie palace in America and was the prototype for all others."

Kathy was hysterical and as amazing as ever. She looked good, her jokes were great and it ended way too quickly. However, it was time to go to theWit Hotel to its new bar and, from what we heard, the hottest new club in Chicago, The Roof, on its 27th floor. This is where the VIP (if only in our minds) status comes about.

Elena's aunt is the Commerce Commissioner of Chicago. She called down to theWit to see if she could get us a reserved table. She did. We were to ask for Chris when we got there. We walked up and stood in line; there was a line to get to this guy with a clipboard, he took your name and you sat down in the lobby to wait until you could go up the elevator to Roof. When we got up to him, Elena asked for Chris (he was Chris) and she said her name and that her aunt had called earlier. "Oh yes, ladies" he says. "I have to warn you though..." his face goes blank and his voice gets very serious, "The Commissioner said you must be on your best behavior or she will have the state police after you." We develop sly grins and laugh. He puts one of those bracelets you get at an event where those who can legally drink are mixed with those who cannot. "Right this way to the elevators, ladies."

An elevator finally opens up and we squeeze in. There are so many people in the elevator I have to keep getting out to let others out on their floor. The second time I get back in and BOOM! I recognize the guy that is standing across from me in the elevator. I fiercely (but discreetly) tap Elena on her leg. She taps me back to say I KNOW! The guy introduces himself to the elevator conductor (yes, they have one of the those) as Benjamin and states he will be going up later with 6 people. The guy was none other than Ben Foster of Six Feet Under and 3:10 to Yuma fame.

We couldn't believe it! A celebrity...on our elevator! And one that we know and truly like his work (even if he does tend to play the psychotic characters). If I hadn't already had two Jose Cuervo margaritas, two dirty martinis and a big glass of, I am sure, very cheap red wine at the show, I would have said something to him or at least caught his eye more or something. No biggie, he said he was coming up to exactly where we were headed...Roof.

Look at this place! It is gorgeous! We got a two person table right by the window so we could see the absolutely wonderful view. http://roofonthewit.therestaurantsatthewit.com/#
If you look at the picture, I can tell you exactly where we were sitting. If you look to the back corner of the room, a bit to the left, there is a lamp. In front of the lamp is a table and to the right of that table is a smaller table with big grey seats. That is the table we were at. I will show you the awesome pic we got of the view when I get it. Elena took a great pic on her phone. (Um, yeah...forgot my camera...Mike took it out a couple of days before I left and completely forgot about it until we were on the train heading downtown from Deerfield.)

So, Benjamin, never ended up coming up or at least not while we were there, but after three drinks each, Elena and I asked for our tab since we needed to catch the last train out to Deerfield at 12:35.

"The tab has already been taken care of."
"What about the tip and everything?"
"Everything has been taken care of."

Not only did Erin get us this great table at one of the hottest new clubs in Chicago but she paid our tab as well. Too nice for words really. So, Elena and I bought a shot and left some money for our waitress and headed out the door. So goes our VIP treatment in Chicago...besides the fact that I almost vomited on the train on the way back...I guess VIP status only lasts so long.

The Rise and "Fall" of the Empire

Alright, folks, here we are, at the sad, sad truth...it is officially Fall. Now, Fall is my favorite season, what with all of the wide-eyed students, football games and general energy around campus. The leaves have started to turn and fall, as well. Cozy sweatshirts, long sleeved t-shirts, scarves and that smell of fall just makes me smile. Pumpkins, squash, warm apple cider, cinnamon and spice room scents, cute boots, Tom and Jerrys, a cozy fire (if you have a fireplace...only thing I miss about Eau Claire, besides Mike's family, of course, is the fireplace we had in our really nice apartment), mulled wine, board games cause there isn't much to do outside anymore, the Wii cause there isn't much to do outside anymore, babies being conceived cause there isn't much to do outside anymore ;).

Now for the kicker...it is damn cold out there!!! It is 8, count them, 8! degrees colder this morning than yesterday morning. They are saying our first freeze could be tonight. We've been spoiled here in September, which is part of it, but I just wasn't prepared for the incredible drop in temperature that is so indicative of Wisconsin weather...I never am. I wore socks yesterday and today...SOCKS! Last night I had on pants, socks, a t-shirt, a zip-up, my robe and a fleece blanket on me...now, granted, in my apartment, it doesn't matter if the windows are closed, the air decides it's just going to go ahead and continue to burst into the place anyway but still, that is a lot of layers!

I will admit that while watching Obsessed (with Beyonce Knowles) with my niece this weekend, I got a bit excited for Christmas (towards the beginning of the movie it was Christmas). I love the songs and I always get such a warm feeling when I think about Christmas...then, I remember that with Christmas and Fall, comes snow...generally lots and lots of snow. This is what I am not looking forward to. The only solace is that when it snows, it is not below zero. All of the meteorologists are saying that we are going to have a mild winter...I cross my fingers everyday that this is true. I'll believe it when I see it. We should have a mild winter after the mild summer we had...on the radio, it was stated that we had more 80 degree days in two weeks of September than we had in all of July. I think we deserve a mild winter for that.

Weird Laws Still On The Books

We were talking about weird laws that are still on the books in various states. Here is a list for Wisconsin:

• Butter substitutes are not allowed to be served in state prisons.
• Whenever two trains meet at an intersection of said tracks, neither shall proceed until the other has.
• As people used to smuggle it in from Illinois, all yellow butter substitute is banned.
• Condoms were considered an obsene article and had to be hidden behind the pharmacist’s counter.
• At one time, margarine was illegal.
• State Law made it illegal to serve apple pie in public restaurants without cheese.
• The state definition of rape stated that it was a man having sex with a woman he knows not to be his wife.
• While all cheese making requires a license, Limburger cheese making requires a master cheese maker’s license.
• It is illegal to kiss on a train.
• It is illegal to cut a woman’s hair.
• Margarine may not be substituted for butter in restaurants unless it is requested by the customer.
• The government may not prohibit manual flushed urinals.
• One may not camp in a wagon on any public highway or risk a fine of up to ten dollars.
• It is a class A misdemeanor to wave a burning torch around in the air.
• It is illegal to throw rocks at a railroad car.
• Livestock have the right-of-way on public roads.

Now here are some from specific cities:

Brookfield

• Tattooing is illegal unless it is done for medical purposes.
• It is unlawful for one to allow another to use the first person’s telephone in order to make prank phone calls.

Hudson

• Screens are required on all windows from May 1 to October 1.
• You are not allowed to put litter into someone else’s trash receptacle without express permission.
• No one may sit on another’s parked vehicle without expressed consent of the owner.

Kenosha

• No male is allowed to be in a state of arousal in public.

La Crosse

• It is illegal to tie up your horse along Third Street (Now a major bar strip).
• It is illegal to display an unclothed mannequin in a store window.
• It is illegal to play checkers in public.
• You cannot “worry a squirrel".

Milwaukee

• An old ordinance forbids parking for over two hours unless a horse is tied to the car.
• It is against the law to play a flute and drums on the streets to attract attention.
• If one is thought of as offensive looking, it is illegal for him to be in public during the day.
• It is illegal to purchase or use Sparklers in the city, yet you can buy fully disassembled automatic machine guns.

Racine

• Missiles may not be shot at parade participants.
• It is illegal to wake a fireman when he is asleep.
• Women may not walk down a public street at night without being accompanied by a man.

Sheboygan

• Only police officers may shoot birds in the city.
• No person may water his lawn in such a way as to annoy his or her neighbor.
• It is illegal to swim in the Fountain Park fountain.

St. Croix

• Women are not allowed to wear anything red in public.

Sun Prairie

• Nuclear weapons may not be manufactured in the city limits.
• Persons may not ride a bicycle with their hands off the handlebars.
• Cats are forbidden from entering cemeteries.
• Even if one gets his/her change “stolen” by a vending machine, hitting the machine violates a city ordinance.
• Unremoved snow on one’s property is considered a public nuisance.

Wauwatosa

• Reserving a city meeting room under a false name is prohibited.
• Spitting on the sidewalk is prohibited.
• If a person shall fail to return books he/she has checked out from the library, that person should return their library card to the library until the books are returned.
• Swimming in water fountains is prohibited.

Genius

(514): Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in --Texts From Last Night

No Shit...

(404): i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
--From Texts From Last Night

In Memorium

"Actor Patrick Swayze, star of "Dirty Dancing" and "Ghost," has died after a battle with cancer, his publicist tells KTLA"--CNN.com Breaking News

This is so disheartening and sad. I know no one can forget "Dirty Dancing" or "Ghost" but I would like to one movie that sometimes gets thrown by the wayside when talking about Patrick Swayze..."Point Break". I loved this movie when I was young. Who couldn't love Keanu Reeves and Patrick Swayze in this movie. Plot from IMDB:

An FBI agent goes undercover to catch a gang of bank robbers who may be surfers.

And if you haven't seen "To Wong Foo Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar", I suggest you go rent it immediately. It is absolutely hysterical! From IMDB:

Three drag queens travel cross-country until their car breaks down, leaving them stranded in a small town.

The movie stars Patrick Swayze, John Leguizamo and Wesley Snipes as the drag queens. It is hilarious. Check out the trailer:

http://movies.nytimes.com/movie/135022/To-Wong-Foo-Thanks-for-Everything-Julie-Newmar/trailers

I think I might have to have a Patrick Swayze movie marathon night.

Don't know if you've noticed...

but I have not started my workout posts which means I have not started my workout regimen...yet. Yes, I do still plan on doing that, especially since the crotch of the pants I am currently wearing at work today insists on being wide open. The pants are zippered, oh yes, but the flap refuses to cover said zipper. I can't really blame the pants, though, can I? Nope. I am sure the pants want to cover their zipper...perhaps it is cold or just doesn't like feeling exposed. Regardless, it is not the pants' fault. No, clearly at fault in this situation are my ever widening hips and incredibly bulbous ass (also ever widening and taking over the lower region of my body).

I know, I know, why don't I just get my ass (and all the other exponentially growing parts) together and just workout already? It is what people like to call lack of motivation, laziness, indolence, soth, inertia, idleness, listlessness, sluggishness, goldbricking...you get the idea. And actually this week, I believe it has to do with the fact that these last couple of weekends have entailed copious amounts of alcohol that are catching up with me, bringing my cold back worse than it was before and giving me the worst case of exhaustion I have felt in a long time.

There has also been so much going on this summer that I never seem to fully recover before the next weekend approaches and it is balls-to-the-wall types of entertainment and stimulus again. I believe that I have had 2, count them, 2 weekends this entire summer that I have actually had nothing planned. I believe I did not move from my couch those 2 entire weekends. It will not let up until about mid-October either. Last weekend, Lauren and other friends were in town and we had our 1st Annual Dunk Tank Extravaganza (best $30 spent probably ever, besides shoes, of course) and the weekend before, Claire was in town for a birthday dinner and night out where the evening was spent "living moment to moment" courtesy of Kari. This weekend I have a bachelorette party in the cities for Mariah's sister Shannon, next weekend is the wedding for said bachelorette in Rochester, MN and then I will have my neice, Kaina, for her birthday weekend. I have the first weekend in October off and then the following, I will be in Chicago to see Kathy Griffin with Elena.

So, anyway, what was I talking about...oh, yeah, working out...gotta keep on top of it. Hopefully I will have some energy tonight to devote to it but if not, I am thinking next week to start?? Oh, shit...

For Jackie

...although I don't think she reads my blog. Oh well, cute and funny anyway:

I. Must. Work. Out.

or I will look like this guy:



I know...I said I was using my workout videos...but I haven't at all this week. So, now I really have to get going on it. I already feel like that guy. I don't quite look like him...yet. I will be back here on Tuesday of next and I will start my weight loss posts. Not that anyone reads my blog (except my Mom and Lisa...oh, and probably my cousin, Elena...and I think Molly said she does...ok, so a few) but it might help me to stay on track if I feel like I have to post about it. I'll try anything at this point, really.

Baby Boom

So, Emily had Olive...what is it, almost 6 months ago now. Jackie had Alex 2 months ago and now Molly is having her baby. She is currently 2 cm dilated and contractions are 3-5 minutes apart. Yay! Another one!

Goodbye, My Loves! I'll Miss You!

Yes, I have decided to quit smoking...not exactly sure why (I know, I know, health reasons and shit) but I am doing it. Mike is quitting so I have decided to quit as well. Well, for the most part...Disclaimer: I reserve the right to bum one or two from Claire or Brian or some other unsuspecting victim when I am having drinks. Oh, what am I getting myself into?!

Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog

H-O-T!!

I don't know what it is about this actor but I find him incredibly attractive. Probably the fact that he plays a badass vampire on the HBO series True Bood. By the way, this is one of the best tv series I have ever watched. It took me a bit of time to get into it but once I did....WOW! Alan Ball is just genius. Yes, it is created by Alan Ball of American Beauty and Six Feet Under fame. His name is Alexander Skarsgard. Pretty sure he has made it to my top 5.

A Vikings and Favre Fan

This is Mike's (and my soon to be) nephew Teddy Annis. He is so cute! And I am glad that he is showing his support for his team and new quarterback...even if I am not a Vikings fan (well, ok, three of my best friends are from Minnesota so I can't say I won't watch them and cheer for them when they are not playing the Packers). Take a look.

New Workout

Um, I didn't know it could be this fun.

Yesterday after work, I finally was able to have some time to start my So You Think You Can Dance workout videos. So I bought the Tone and Groove and Cardio Funk and I also bought a Bollywood workout video.

I got home, fed the cat and put on some workout gear. I put in the Tone and Grove video. I had done the warm up the previous day before going over to Mariah's house for dinner (homemade gazpacho - it is so good!) and then to volleyball. I got a bit of a sweat on doing just that. So, I did the warm up again to, you guessed it, warm up and then I did the first workout, a hip hop routine with Twitch, runner up from last season.

Holy shit! I have never sweat so much in my life! My tank was soaked but not only that, practically my whole sports bra was too and that never happens. I am pretty sure that you guys know by now that I do not like to work hard...I play hard, I do not work hard and certainly do not workout very hard. The great thing about the workout is it didn't feel at all like a workout. I mean, I was breathing hard and the sweat was dripping off of me but I was learning a dance routine so it didn't feel at all like working out. And, I know that it is working cause I am sore today, like everywhere. I am so glad that I decided to purchase these videos. I can't wait to do the routine from Twitch again and I can't wait to learn the others. I think that I have finally found something that I won't get bored with. So you think you can dance...yes, yes I do...and lose weight doing it.

Oh, and, So You Think You Can Dance is coming back in September already. I can't wait! Seriously the most marvelous show ever created! I laugh, I cry and I scream with Mary Murphy. Hot Tamale Train, coming through!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Childhood Movies

"Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the fuck was going on when I first saw it."

Mariah and I found this out about Pee Wee's Big Adventure directed by Tim Burton our sophomore year of college. I am pretty sure we got high and sat down on the couch and saw the movie was on HBO or something. We were so excited cause we had watched it all the time when we were younger. After, I would say, about a half hour or so, we both just turned towards each other with this look and we both agreed that this was the most bizarre movie we had ever seen which was weird because as a child we never thought that at all. I mean there was that scary part with Large Marge but for the most part we were like, (insert cute little girl voice here) "Poor Pee Wee lost his bike and he needs it back!" Don't get me wrong, the movie still kicks ass but we literally hadn't seen it since we were little and we were not expecting the bizarro world Tim Burton created. It really makes you think about the child brain and how differently than adults they perceive things.

Now-a-days, I am completely aware of the bizarroness that is Tim Burton and welcome it wholeheartedly. For me, he rarely ever disappoints (sorry but I did not really enjoy Charlie and the Chocolate Factory) and I know he will not disappoint with his newest endeavor, Alice in Wonderland.



I will not be late for this important date.

Very Interesting...

Weed, Man

Student: I don't like coffee.
Me: What do you do to wake up?
Student: I open my eyes.

Too funny. And this was at work so no, he was not stoned.

In Memorium

I didn't even get a CNN.com breaking news email about this. I am very upset. Much of my childhood was spent watching John Hughes' movies. Sixteen Candles was Elena and my's favorite movie and we watched it incessantly when we would go stay at our aunt Sandy's house in Darlington. We would spout the line "Can I borrow your underwear for 10 minutes?" and just fall over laughing hysterically. And who could forget Long Duk Dong? Or Jake Ryan (how dreamy!)? We were incredibly envious of Ferris Bueller ( and his sneaky way of getting what he wanted but mostly for getting out of school as that was what we all really wanted at the time.

Reading about him, I was surprised to find that he wrote and produced Planes, Trains and Automobiles and Home Alone, two films I also love to this day.

His movies defined and era, bad fashion and all, and I am incredibly sad to find out of his death. He will be missed.

"She Wolf" by Shakira

I don't like the song but I can't help but like Shakira's videos. Perhaps it is the way she moves but they always continue to excite and interest me.

Shakira - New Music - More Music Videos

Txts Frm Lst Nght

I love the website txts frm lst nght. It is just too funny! For those of you who do not know, this website is a blog where you can submit text messages that you received or sent and they tend to be really funny, dirty and/or disgusting.

So, I love this site but I have to think that some of these are made up. Take this one for instance:

(703): BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.

Now if this were true, I highly doubt someone would take the time to text this instead of screaming and taking their pants off. And this one:

(716): You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.

I am not sure that I believe this happened. Unless it is exaggerated, like he just stuck the thing between his cheeks, not up his ass, which is entirely possible.

Regardless, they make me laugh even if I don't believe them so I guess I should just shut the hell up and enjoy, huh?

Um, Whoa...Of course, Love them!

--via SHOELUST

Watch Out For The 5-0, Part 2

So, the Po-Po are giving every opportunity for your speeding asses to slow the fuck down. It was announced again this morning that "the police would like speeders to know they will be ticketing again today between 7 and 1, this time on Speedway".

I don't know why I am so flabbergasted that the police are sending out warnings via the airwaves but I am and I can't help it. I really cannot find the logic in it. I mean, like I said yesterday, I guess it is to cut down the speeding on that particular street, during that particular time of day but, again, it seems counter intuitive. I mean, they can just kill two birds with one stone...fill their quota and deter speeding by saying "Hello! See here. We are pulling people over so slow your fucking asses down!". This just seems more along the lines of what cops do on a day to day basis anyway and will do regardless of what is going on over on Speedway between the hours of 7 and 1.

All I know is that I watch out for the 5-0 always, regardless...they are wiley little creatures, you know.

Cirque du Soleil - Need To See This

Creation Journal | Vaudeville | Cirque du Soleil

Shared via AddThis

I have always known this to be true of myself...I feel it in my bones.

Watch Out For The 5-0

So, this is what I heard on the radio this morning on the way to work:

"The Police Department would like you to know that they will be ticketing speeders on the 1400 block of Johnson today."

I can't help but think this is counter intuitive. I mean, I guess they just want people to not speed but also I have never met a cop that didn't want to bust somebody doing something and they certainly aren't going to tell you beforehand. I know that it is their job to do so but I have never heard of them putting out a newscast to warn people they will be ticketing a particular area of a street.

It was also pretty funny because when I heard the newscast on Air America, I had just driven by two cops who had pulled over a car precisely where the newscast said they would. Guess the guy should have been listening to Air America but I am glad he wasn't cause I wholeheartedly speed on that street on my way to work and because that guy got pulled over, I knew that I was probably in the clear to go about my business as usual. Thanks, man!

LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!!!! I don't even really like pink for me but I would wear those anyday!

"I held out my hands & asked where I could help & somebody grabbed me & pointed me towards the future & said, You've got your work cut out for you & I said, isn't there anything easier? & he laughed & said you could dig around in the past, but it's just busywork & that made perfect sense so I shrugged & started right where I was, along with everyone else"

Brian Andreas, StoryPeople

"Um, I am disturbed there are even rules."

--Claire, referring to a drinking game where everyone loses, meaning has to drink so I guess it could be that everyone wins, depending on how you look at it

"Can America's favorite serial killer really have it all?"

Dexter Premiere, September 27th

"Strange memories on this nervous night in Las Vegas. Has it been five years? Six? It seems like a lifetime, the kind of peak that never comes again. San Francisco in the middle sixties was a very special time and place to be a part of. But no explanation, no mix of words or music or memories can touch that sense of knowing that you were there and alive in that corner of time in the world. Whatever it meant. There was madness in any direction, at any hour. You could strike sparks anywhere. There was a fantastic universal sense that whatever we were doing was right, that we were winning. And that, I think, was the handle - that sense of inevitable victory over the forces of old and evil. Not in any mean or military sense; we didn't need that. Our energy would simply prevail. We had all the momentum; we were riding the crest of a high and beautiful wave. So now, less than five years later, you can go up on a steep hill in Las Vegas and look west, and with the right kind of eyes you can almost see the high-water mark - that place where the wave finally broke and rolled back."

Raoul Duke (Hunter S. Thompson) - Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

Personalized License Plates

So I hate personalized license plates that make no sense. I was driving to work this morning and this car gets in front of me and it has SMILN IS on it's license plate. Ok, I get that SMILN is smiling but then they have to add the IS in there. Smiling is what? It just is or are you trying to say something else?

So, instead of paying attention to the road, I am starring intently at this license plate trying to figure this out. Luckily, the car turned or I passed it or something but I still am trying to figure out what smiling is.

I have seen LUV COW...extremely presumptive on his/her part (unless they have been told many, many times they are great at it) but I get it. I have seen XLR8IN...well, no shit Sherlock but again, I get it.

I used to want to get a personalized license plate so bad when I got my license and I am glad I never did. You end up coming off as extremely arrogant or incredibly stupid.

Dean: This contract is signed, countersigned and notarized. Looks like your fucked.

Celia: No, isn't there something you can do?

Dean: I can get you high.

Celia: No, I'm clean. Do you have any booze?

Weeds on Showtime

So Excited!

Adulthood

So last night we all went over to Molly and Ben's to see Em and Matt who were in town for a short visit. It was somewhat of an eye opening event. I believe we have all finally reached adulthood. There was food and drink, of course, but there were babies. Two babies...Olive and Alex...and soon there will be another one and if some of the rest of us have any say in the matter, we will have more in a year, year and a half.

We have moved out of the "let's get together and get wasted" realm (although that still is my mantra) and into the "let's get together and have a bit of wine, great conversation and play with the babies" realm. Less sucking down shots and more sucking on nuks that have fallen on the floor (although not entirely true...there just might be a baby in the other hand, therefore, needing a friend's hand to hold the lemon up to your mouth so you can bite it after the shot goes down...right, Jackie...hehe).

Though things haven't entirely changed, as noted above, but the things that have, have just made our group a little richer and a little fuller. We were always a family but I feel like that has just become a bit more solidified.

Do, Re, Me, Fa, So, La, Ti, Do

I saw a post on Mariah's blog regarding the Sound of Music. Take a look at this. It's pretty cool.

Sound of Music Train Station @ Yahoo! Video

Lost without Lost

--via onlycupcakes

Hahaha!

--via 9GAG

Didn't even know there was an eclipse

A Japanese satellite took this image of the eclipse an hour before totality.

The eclipse's impact can been seen in this second picture, taken an hour later,
via the large black shadow.

Hey baby, wanna come over to myspace and let me twitter ur yahoo 'til u google all over my facebook......LMAO.

Lyrics to Song

"Come Back to Me" by David Cook

I don't usually like the music of the American Idol contestants, save Kelly Clarkson (which is only because "Since You've Been Gone" was Molly and Mariah's favorite song and we would have a blast dancing and singing to the song on numerous occasions after hours at the Sandlot...it became more of a memory I truly enjoyed rather than a song I truly enjoyed but whatever...ok, I admit, I kind of like her new single "I Do Not Hook Up" for some reason that is beyond my grasp or control).

I also don't usually like the sound of this kind of music. You know, that sort of cry baby rock music that kind of sounds like Scott Stapp from Creed (despise that band, although, I will admit that at one time in my life at a very young age, I did...please do not blame foolish youth, ok). But for some strange reason, and maybe it is because I heard him do this song acoustic on Bob and Tom the other morning on my way to work, I really like this song. I think it maybe the lyrics more than the way it actually sounds but I like it. I never saw him on Idol cause I don't watch the show, especially after they are done with auditions (I only like to see the dreadful performances) but when I heard him on Bob and Tom, I enjoyed it.

Also, a little tidbit regarding this video: on Bob and Tom, he told us that in order to do this video he had to sing the song backwards as he was walking forward. Pretty cool, too, if you ask me.

Also of note: he was a genuinely funny person on the air as well.

(703): I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.--via txts frm lst nght

This reminds me of Claire, sophomore year of college, when we wanted to find out about the size of our friend's except that she was willing to "take one for the team" as we put it. She never ended up doing it and I know she and the rest of us are much better for it.

This is torture...but I love it

Um, want...


and want...

Funny

While the C-5 was turning over its engines, a female crewman gave the G.I.s on board the usual
information regarding seat belts, emergency exits, etc.

Finally, she said, 'Now sit back and enjoy your trip while your captain, Judith Campbell, and crew
take you safely to Afghanistan '

An old MSgt. sitting in the eighth row thought to himself, 'Did I hear her right? Is the captain a woman? '

When the attendant came by he said 'Did I understand you right? Is the captain a woman?'
'Yes,'! said the attendant, 'In fact, this entire crew is female.'



'My God,' he said, 'I wish I had two double scotch and sodas. I don't know what to think
with only women up there in the cockpit.'

'That's another thing, Sergeant,' said the crew member, 'We No Longer Call It The Cockpit'

'It's The Box Office.'

Quote of the day:

'Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby.

If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal..

If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.

So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit.

This is definitely me...I need this t-shirt

--via Snorg Tees

A Step In The Right Direction

Marijuana Supporters Welcome a Tax Increase

By JESSE McKINLEY

Published: July 23, 2009

Voters in Oakland, Calif., raised taxes on medical marijuana, which supporters saw as a step in the legitimatization of the cannabis industry.

(516): I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering “I’m Alex Mac! I’m Alex Mac!

--via txts frm lst nght

I loved that show!

(785): Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.

--via txts frm lst nght

I know the feeling.